The Problem of Pain

The reality of pain is perhaps the hardest thing to overcome for those who are not religious and are looking for a reason to live. Even for the devout the problem of pain is a difficult one. They ask why would a just and loving God allow pain and are told that it is their fault due to freewill and God is completely blameless in the whole pain thing (no comment) or that it is all part of a great plan for which they will be rewarded in the next life. Some are okay with that explanation, some struggle with it. But what about those of us who do not believe in a next life? What about those of us who don't believe in an eternal reward that will make all of the pain and suffering of life worth while? How do we cope with it all? Why continue to live when there is so much pain and suffering in the world? For the devout the answer is simple. They believe that the pain serves some devine purpose. It is either preparing us for the next life after we are dead, a test to see if we are worthy for the next stage of enlightenment or it is a price we must pay for the rewards we will recieve once we are dead. For those of us who do not believe in such things the problem is more difficult.

If life is finite than all the worth and meaning to be derived from it must be within these finite boundaries of eighty-five years, give or take. Many existentialists have therefore argued that life is without meaning due to the fact that death exists at the end of life. Death is the period at the end of the sentence that not only concludes the sentence but erases it. It is the delete button that washes away all of your input as if it had never been. So many ask what is the point of spending so much time inputting data when at the end the plug gets pulled and it all gets erased? When for the vast majority of people in two or three generations everyone who ever knew us will be dead and our memories will have left this earth as completely as our bodies. Why do anything?

The existentialists then answers "Why not do everything?" If life is meaningless than nothing is worth doing but then nothing is worth not doing. The only inspiration to act or not act then becomes pleasure and pain and pain is an inescapable consequence of existence. The avoidance of pain and the pursuit of pleasure stirs us into action no matter how futile our intellects may tell us that action is in some grand cosmic scheme of things. The natural movement of every living organism is from pleasure and towards pain. So, despite what our intellects may tell us about ultimate meaning there is much joy to be had in things that may or may not be ultimately meaningless. There is also much pain. Pain, frustration, discomfort, and dissapointment are the price you pay for each breath that you take and if life is ultimately meaningless than this pain is too high and all pain is therefore an injustice. So what do we do about it? How do we live a life more pleasurable?

If pain was all that life had to offer my reccomendation would be to end your life as quickly as possible but life does possess its pleasures in equal number though we are perhaps less aware and less appreciative of the joys of life because the pain is often so overwhelming. What we have forgotten about in this judgement of pain is the possibility of pleasure. Pleasure is often the reward for our pain and the only injustice is therefore when there is an imbalance. When the agonies of existence outweigh the joys. Because pain is such a powerful all-consuming sensation it is often difficult to weigh the pleasures of life against the suffering since the pain almost always seems greater. The orgasm, and even the prickles of excitement leading up to it, is one of the few positive physical sensations that are great enough to overwhelm pain the way pain can so easily overwhelm pleaure. If life were on big orgasm there would be no need for this discussion. But it ain't and there are far more painful sensations of the magnitude of an orgasm as there are pleasurable ones. As Arthur Schopenhauer put it, "...all that opposes, frustrates and resists our will, that is to say all that is unpleasant and painful, impresses itself upon us intstantly and with great clarity. Just as we are conscious not of the healthiness of our whole body but only of the little spot where the shoe pinches, so we think not of the totality of our succesful activities but of some insignificant trifle or other which continues to vex us."

When it comes to the joys of life we are unappreciative. We take much for granted. We do not recognize our own good fortune until we are conffonted with those less fortunate. We whine about the Mercedes we don't have even while others take the bus. We whine about the bigger house we wish we could afford while others sleep in boxes beneath the freeway. We whine about the cottage cheese on our thighs while others are too obese to lift themselves from their beds unassisted. We complain about our jobs while others wait in the unemployment line. We whine to our lovers about not being as attractive as the actors and models in movies and magazines while others still struggle to find mates. So what exactly am I saying? Am I saying we should expect less and learn to accept and appreciate the meager table scraps that life throws us? Well, in a sense that is exactly what I am saying. I am saying reach for the stars but accept and appreciate the moon because there are many still stuck on Terra Firma.

This of course still does not deal with the problem of pain. There is still so much pain in this world even if we except that there are many pleasures that we do not realize we are experiencing and that we are taking for granted. Even if I was to become suddenly aware of every minor joy of life, the smell of a rose would still not mask the stench of sewage and pollution. The sunrise would still not blind us to the thousands of roaches scurrying from the light, the love of a woman would still not take away the pain of a heartbreak. The taste of the finest pastry still does not dull the pain and shame of obesity or compensate for the memory of hunger. Even the joy of running does not often compensate for the pain of falling. Pain is such an overwhelming sensation that very few things in life can match it and the few that can often result in greater pain later. Sex, drugs, the thrill of victory, the joy of accomplishment, all things we experience far less frequently than pain, failure, and dissapointment and all have the potential to increase the pain in our lives much more than the pleasure they provide. There are many ways you can increase the ferquency of such things in your life yet for every effort spent in increasing your pleasure there is a neccessary amount of pain that may or may not be justified by the end result and there is the possibility of failure looming large in the background, the possibility that all your efforts, all your struggle and sacrfice will amount to nothing but yet another dissapointment. So what do we do about all of this pain? The answer lies in our perception of it. Let's take a look back at the existentialists.

When Jean-Paul Sartre told us that life was meaningless he also talked about what he termed "an absurd freedom", the notion that if life was meaningless all things would be possible. Experience, as shown above, rebutts that all things may be possible but not all are probable and the resultant pain may make none of it at all desirable. So how do we cope with this? I can only tell you how I have come to grips with it.

I maximize my pleasure and minimize my pain by first minimizing my desires to things that are absolutely neccessary and attainable. I take all the pleasure I can in things that, as Epicurus prescribes, would cause me discomfort and pain were they absent and limit the amount of pleasure that I seek from things that would cause me no great discomfort were they absent from my life. Pleasures that are not neccessary for our existence or mental or spiritual health should be shunned and when they are not they merely add to our wants and thereby add to our frustrations and dissapointments. Things like alcohol and drugs are not neccessities. They are manufactured wants. Manufactured in our minds. Not being high or drunk would not cause me any pain unless I had already manufactured that need within myself and therefore getting rid of that need could only increase my capacity for pleasure. I have never gotten high and I have never experienced any pain from this. Neither would not having a Mercedes Benz or not having a million dollar home or not having a woman who looked like a supermodel cause me a moment's pain had I not first convinced myself that I needed these things in order to make myself happy. Though they would all be nice, it would be foolish to link my happiness to any of them.

Lack of food has the painful and negative consequence of hunger. Lack of sex has the negative consequence of sexual frustration. Lack of shelter has hypothermia in the winter and heat stroke in the summer to vex us. Lack of clothing has shame and exposure to the elements. Lack of friends and family has loneliness and a decreased ability to acquire the commodities of existence that could even lead to death if and when you are ever in a position where you cannot acquire such things without assistance. Yet seeking any of these things in excess has the potential to lead to pain and frustration. All things in moderation is therefore wise though there are still ways to seek these things in abundance without experiencing an increase in pain as I will describe below. But cell phones, fast cars, video games, and millions of other useless trifles cause us pain only because they are unnatural manufactured desires that merely add to our already vast need. The things we own inevitably come to own us. Our possession become a weight around our necks. The man who could derive all the pleasure he needs from within would be the wisest and most content of all men. Most of us could never hope to acheive this. Still, it ain't a bad goal. Limit your desires is the first key to maximizing your pleasures in life and minimizing your pain.

"But that sounds like merely surviving not living? I want the highs of life. I want passion!"

I couldn't agree more. If your life is reduced to merely the avoidance of pain than again I'd say just end it. You must seek pleasure as well but seek it in a way that will not lead to more pain. Let me share with you a little trick of mine. It goes back to our perception of things. Enjoy life. That's it. Enjoy it. Experience every joy that you can and take nothing for granted and then when the pain comes ignore it.

"Ignore it? How do I do that? You already said that pain is a more intense experience than pleasure. How am I supposed to just ignore it?"

You ignore it by embracing the absurdity of life, embracing its utter meaningless. You enjoy life the same way you enjoy a movie. You suspend your disbelief and allow yourself to believe in it, you absorb yourself in it so that you can enjoy all that it has to offer, then when the tragic parts come you let your suspension of disbelief come crashing down and you step back outside to your point of objectivity and calmly announce that it is only a movie. In other words you let the tragic parts roll off you by remembering that it is al meaningless in the end anyway. One day you will die and none of it will have meant anything. When the tragic parts have passed you let yourself slip right back into the illusion thereby maximizing your pleasure and minimizing your pain. This allows you to enjoy some manufactured desires without the immobilizing fear of failure. It's what allowed me to step into the ring in search of the thrill of victory without fear of defeat. It's what allows me to submit my writing in search of fame and acclaim without fear that I will be crushed by rejection. When my mother tells me that she has always been impressed by my unwavering tenacity, this is where I get it from. I hope for the best, strive for the most, but I am always prepared for the worst. In the back of my mind I always know that one day all of this will be reduced to dust and stench and none of it will have made a damned bit of difference. I know it sounds depressing but it's actually quite liberating. Try it. If that fails, there is still the blessed orgasm.